Restless-Shutdown Day 6

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Restless, thy name is marieke today. Add a day of rain to a government shutdown, and you have the perfect recipe for cabin fever.

The first half of the day was spent on one attempt after another to create a shutdown song, but I just could not find the angle. I even tried replacing the uke for a guitar. After a half an hour on the guitar—which seemed even larger than I ever remembered—I wound up with a deeper, more powerful sound and numbness in my right arm.

Finally, toward the late afternoon, my sweetie and I left the couch for a walk in a misty wood. I was grouchy. None of my photos were coming out as I wanted them to, my scarf was itching my neck, and I felt combative and unsettled.

What was wrong with me?

This time of year, I always feel restless, and being out of work has inspired deeper thought about what I am doing with my life, where it is going, and if I am happy.

I do not regularly consider my emotional state. I just keep plugging away.

Write.

Compose a song.

Create something.

Anything.

Just keep going.

By the end of the walk, I felt better. Going outside and getting out of my head is a good practice. a reminder that I am just one being dancing in a larger universe whose complexity I cannot begin to imagine.

Thank you for:

The rain.

The trees watching over me.

The vibrant colors, made even more vivid by the rain.

A beaver, swimming back and forth through clear water.

My love for his patience.

A wise universe.

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