life of m

Sustaining the Self and Beyond

It’s just not necessary

Leave a comment

I find it really interesting—not the good kind of interesting—when I am judged before a person has even met me. I have been contacting local galleries about performing for a Prescott’s 4th Friday Art Walk performance. This is a volunteer gig where you play for tips.

I emailed back and forth with a fellow from one of the galleries about a time to meet. I had something come up last minute the day we were scheduled to meet and contacted him right away. I didn’t have his telephone number, so I emailed him. In response, he sent an email reprimanding me for being a flakey musician. I apologized and wished him well, and he sent yet another hostile message.

What I find even more intriguing, albeit disheartening, is that the awful energy and hostility from this one person has successfully overshadowed the kindness and light I have received from countless others on this very same day.

Why is that? I have asked this question time and again in my life.

I can recognize that each person who sends such negative intention my way seems to have suffered from a past or current trauma. This particular individual told me that other musicians had not shown up for gigs in the past. One violinist decided to go on a picnic instead.

I tried to explain that I was not that violinist. As I am reflecting on this experience while I write, I am realizing that I don’t really need to explain myself to him or anyone else. I have learned with time and experience that there are some individuals with whom it is not worth wasting time and effort trying to engage in a dialogue because their idea of dialogue is a one-way lecture of sorts. To even be heard or seen as having an opinion of value is next to impossible.

As with so many weird encounters with other beings, I don’t think the person’s behavior was really about me. He will, however, be added to the list of individuals I hope can find peace and joy in their lives and not direct whatever unhappiness they are holding onto toward other people.

The world needs more kindness and understanding, so I am doing my best to empathize with him and to recognize that he had been spurned by musicians in the past and thus felt that I, too, had spurned him.

I hope he can come to understand that not all musicians or people are flakey and that no person deserves this kind of treatment or judgment.

Rainbow over the Dells

Advertisements

Author: marieke

I am a writer, artist, musician, songwriter, editor, and yogi. I am a seeker and a wanderer. I love spending time learning about the wildness of human nature and the world around me.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s